Josh Billings Quotes, Sayings, Remarks, Thoughts and Speeches
Josh Billings Quotes and Sayings
- 1
A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than you love yourself.
Josh Billings | Refcard PDF ↑
- 2
A good way I know to find happiness, is to not bore a hole to fit the plug.
Josh Billings | Refcard PDF ↑
- 3
A puppy plays with every pup he meets, but an old dog has few associates.
Josh Billings | Refcard PDF ↑
- 4
About the most originality that any writer can hope to achieve honestly is to steal with good judgment.
Josh Billings | Refcard PDF ↑
- 5
About the only difference between the poor and the rich, is this, the poor suffer misery, while the rich have to enjoy it.
Josh Billings | Refcard PDF ↑
- 6
Adversity has the same effect on a man that severe training has on the pugilist: it reduces him to his fighting weight.
Josh Billings | Refcard PDF ↑
- 7
Advice is like castor oil, easy enough to give but dreadful uneasy to take.
Josh Billings | Refcard PDF ↑
- 8
As a general thing, when a woman wears the pants in a family, she has a good right to them.
Josh Billings | Refcard PDF ↑
- 9
As scarce as truth is, the supply has always been in excess of the demand.
Josh Billings | Refcard PDF ↑
- 10
Be kind to your mother-in-law, but pay for her board at some good hotel.
Josh Billings | Refcard PDF ↑
- 11
Be like a postage stamp. Stick to one thing until you get there.
Josh Billings | Refcard PDF ↑
- 12
Common sense is instinct, and enough of it is genius.
Josh Billings | Refcard PDF ↑
- 13
Common sense is the knack of seeing things as they are, and doing things as they ought to be done.
Josh Billings | Refcard PDF ↑
- 14
Confess your sins to the Lord and you will be forgiven; confess them to man and you will be laughed at.
Josh Billings | Refcard PDF ↑
- 15
Consider the postage stamp: its usefulness consists in the ability to stick to one thing till it gets there.
Josh Billings | Refcard PDF ↑
- 16
Don't ever prophesy; for if you prophesy wrong, nobody will forget it; and if you prophesy right, nobody will remember it.
Josh Billings | Refcard PDF ↑
- 17
Economy is a savings-bank, into which men drop pennies, and get dollars in return.
Josh Billings | Refcard PDF ↑
- 18
Every man has his follies - and often they are the most interesting thing he has got.
Josh Billings | Refcard PDF ↑
- 19
Flattery is like cologne water, to be smelt, not swallowed.
Josh Billings | Refcard PDF ↑
- 20
Genius ain't anything more than elegant common sense.
Josh Billings | Refcard PDF ↑
- 21
Honesty is the rarest wealth anyone can possess, and yet all the honesty in the world ain't lawful tender for a loaf of bread.
Josh Billings | Refcard PDF ↑
- 22
I have lived in this world just long enough to look carefully the second time into things that I am most certain of the first time.
Josh Billings | Refcard PDF ↑
- 23
I have never known a person to live to be one hundred and be remarkable for anything else.
Josh Billings | Refcard PDF ↑
- 24
I haven't got as much money as some folks, but I've got as much impudence as any of them, and that's the next thing to money.
Josh Billings | Refcard PDF ↑
- 25
I think when the full horror of being fifty hits you, you should stay home and have a good cry.
Josh Billings | Refcard PDF ↑
- 26
If a man should happen to reach perfection in this world, he would have to die immediately to enjoy himself.
Josh Billings | Refcard PDF ↑
- 27
If there was no faith there would be no living in this world. We could not even eat hash with any safety.
Josh Billings | Refcard PDF ↑
- 28
If you ever find happiness by hunting for it, you will find it, as the old woman did her lost spectacles, safe on her own nose all the time.
Josh Billings | Refcard PDF ↑
- 29
It ain't often that a man's reputation outlasts his money.
Josh Billings | Refcard PDF ↑
- 30
It is a very delicate job to forgive a man, without lowering him in his own estimation, and yours too.
Josh Billings | Refcard PDF ↑
- 31
It is better to know nothing than to know what ain't so.
Josh Billings | Refcard PDF ↑
- 32
It is much easier to repent of sins that we have committed than to repent of those that we intend to commit.
Josh Billings | Refcard PDF ↑
- 33
It is not all bad, this getting old, ripening. After the fruit has got its growth it should juice up and mellow. God forbid I should live long enough to ferment and rot and fall to the ground in a squash.
Josh Billings | Refcard PDF ↑
- 34
It's not only the most difficult thing to know one's self, but the most inconvenient.
Josh Billings | Refcard PDF ↑
- 35
Knowledge is like money: the more he gets, the more he craves.
Josh Billings | Refcard PDF ↑
- 36
Laughter is the sensation of feeling good all over and showing it principally in one place.
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- 37
Learning sleeps and snores in libraries, but wisdom is everywhere, wide awake, on tiptoe.
Josh Billings | Refcard PDF ↑
- 38
Life consists not in holding good cards but in playing those you hold well.
Josh Billings | Refcard PDF ↑
- 39
Life is short, but it's long enough to ruin any man who wants to be ruined.
Josh Billings | Refcard PDF ↑
- 40
Love is said to be blind, but I know some fellows in love who can see twice as much in their sweethearts as I do.
Josh Billings | Refcard PDF ↑
- 41
Love looks through a telescope; envy, through a microscope.
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- 42
Man was created a little lower than the angels and has bin getting a little lower ever since.
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- 43
Marrying for love may be a bit risky, but it is so honest that God can't help but smile on it.
Josh Billings | Refcard PDF ↑
- 44
Men mourn for what they have lost; women for what they ain't got.
Josh Billings | Refcard PDF ↑
- 45
Money will buy a pretty good dog, but it won't buy the wag of his tail.
Josh Billings | Refcard PDF ↑
- 46
Most people repent their sins by thanking God they ain't so wicked as their neighbors.
Josh Billings | Refcard PDF ↑
- 47
Most people when they come to you for advice, come to have their own opinions strengthened, not corrected.
Josh Billings | Refcard PDF ↑
- 48
No one can disgrace us but ourselves.
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- 49
Old maids sweeten their tea with scandal.
Josh Billings | Refcard PDF ↑
- 50
One of rarest things that a man ever does is to do the best he can.
Josh Billings | Refcard PDF ↑
- 51
One of the best temporary cures for pride and affectation is seasickness; a man who wants to vomit never puts on airs.
Josh Billings | Refcard PDF ↑
- 52
One of the greatest victories you can gain over someone is to beat him at politeness.
Josh Billings | Refcard PDF ↑
- 53
One of the rarest things that a man ever does, is to do the best he can.
Josh Billings | Refcard PDF ↑
- 54
Reason often makes mistakes, but conscience never does.
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- 55
Remember the poor, it costs nothing.
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- 56
Silence is one of the hardest arguments to refute.
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- 57
Take all the fools out of this world and there wouldn't be any fun living in it, or profit.
Josh Billings | Refcard PDF ↑
- 58
The best medicine I know for rheumatism is to thank the Lord that it ain't gout.
Josh Billings | Refcard PDF ↑
- 59
The best time for you to hold your tongue is the time you feel you must say something or bust.
Josh Billings | Refcard PDF ↑
- 60
The best way to convince a fool that he is wrong is to let him have his own way.
Josh Billings | Refcard PDF ↑
- 61
The man whose only pleasure in life is making money, weighs less on the moral scale than an angleworm.
Josh Billings | Refcard PDF ↑
- 62
The road to ruin is always in good repair, and the travellers pay the expense of it.
Josh Billings | Refcard PDF ↑
- 63
The thinner the ice, the more anxious is everyone to see whether it will bear.
Josh Billings | Refcard PDF ↑
- 64
The trouble with people is not that they don't know but that they know so much that ain't so.
Josh Billings | Refcard PDF ↑
- 65
The wheel that squeaks the loudest is the one that gets the grease.
Josh Billings | Refcard PDF ↑
- 66
There are lots of people who mistake their imagination for their memory.
Josh Billings | Refcard PDF ↑
- 67
There are people who are always anticipating trouble, and in this way they manage to enjoy many sorrows that never really happen to them.
Josh Billings | Refcard PDF ↑
- 68
There are some people so addicted to exaggeration that they can't tell the truth without lying.
Josh Billings | Refcard PDF ↑
- 69
There are two kinds of fools: those who can't change their opinions and those who won t.
Josh Billings | Refcard PDF ↑
- 70
There are two things in life for which we are never truly prepared: twins.
Josh Billings | Refcard PDF ↑
- 71
There is no greater evidence of superior intelligence than to be surprised at nothing.
Josh Billings | Refcard PDF ↑
- 72
There is no revenge so complete as forgiveness.
Josh Billings | Refcard PDF ↑
- 73
There is nothing so easy to learn as experience and nothing so hard to apply.
Josh Billings | Refcard PDF ↑
- 74
There's a great power in words, if you don't hitch too many of them together.
Josh Billings | Refcard PDF ↑
- 75
There's a lot of people in this world who spend so much time watching their health that they haven't the time to enjoy it.
Josh Billings | Refcard PDF ↑
- 76
Threescore years and ten is enough; if a man can't suffer all the misery he wants in that time, he must be numb.
Josh Billings | Refcard PDF ↑
- 77
Time is like money, the less we have of it to spare the further we make it go.
Josh Billings | Refcard PDF ↑
- 78
To bring up a child in the way he should go, travel that way yourself once in a while.
Josh Billings | Refcard PDF ↑
- 79
When a man comes to me for advice, I find out the kind of advice he wants, and I give it to him.
Josh Billings | Refcard PDF ↑
- 80
Wisdom has never made a bigot, but learning has.
Josh Billings | Refcard PDF ↑
- 81
Woman's influence is powerful, especially when she wants something.
Josh Billings | Refcard PDF ↑
- 82
Words are often seen hunting for an idea, but ideas are never seen hunting for words.
Josh Billings | Refcard PDF ↑
