Scott Adams Quotes
Scott Adams Quotes
- 1
Be careful that what you write does not offend anybody or cause problems within the company. The safest approach is to remove all useful information.
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- 2
Consultants have credibility because they are not dumb enough to work at your company.
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- 3
Creativity is allowing yourself to make mistakes. Art is knowing which ones to keep.
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- 4
Engineers like to solve problems. If there are no problems handily available, they will create their own problems.
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- 5
Free will is an illusion. People always choose the perceived path of greatest pleasure.
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- 6
I get mail; therefore I am.
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- 7
I respectfully decline the invitation to join your hallucination.
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- 8
If a job's worth doing, it's too hard.
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- 9
If there are no stupid questions, then what kind of questions do stupid people ask? Do they get smart just in time to ask questions?
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- 10
If you have any trouble sounding condescending, find a Unix user to show you how it's done.
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- 11
In less enlightened times, the best way to impress women was to own a hot car. But women wised up and realized it was better to buy their own hot cars so they wouldn't have to ride around with jerks.
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- 12
Informed decision-making comes from a long tradition of guessing and then blaming others for inadequate results.
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- 13
Let's form proactive synergy restructuring teams.
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- 14
Most success springs from an obstacle or failure. I became a cartoonist largely because I failed in my goal of becoming a successful executive.
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- 15
Normal people... believe that if it ain't broke, don't fix it. Engineers believe that if it ain't broke, it doesn't have enough features yet.
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- 16
Nothing defines humans better than their willingness to do irrational things in the pursuit of phenomenally unlikely payoffs. This is the principle behind lotteries, dating, and religion.
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- 17
Nothing inspires forgiveness quite like revenge.
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- 18
One way to compensate for a tiny brain is to pretend to be dead.
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- 19
Remember there's no such thing as a small act of kindness. Every act creates a ripple with no logical end.
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- 20
Remind people that profit is the difference between revenue and expense. This makes you look smart.
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- 21
The best things in life are silly.
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- 22
The creator of the universe works in mysterious ways. But he uses a base ten counting system and likes round numbers.
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- 23
The longer you work here, diverse it gets.
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- 24
The only risk of failure is promotion.
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- 25
There are very few personal problems that cannot be solved through a suitable application of high explosives.
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- 26
There's nothing more dangerous than a resourceful idiot.
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- 27
We must develop knowledge optimization initiatives to leverage our key learnings.
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- 28
You can never underestimate the stupidity of the general public.
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- 29
You don't have to be a "person of influence" to be influential. In fact, the most influential people in my life are probably not even aware of the things they've taught me.
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