Lenny Bruce Quotes, Sayings, Remarks, Thoughts and Speeches
Lenny Bruce Quotes and Sayings
- 1
A lot of people say to me, 'Why did you kill Christ?' I dunno, it was one of those parties, got out of hand, you know.
Lenny Bruce | Refcard PDF ↑
- 2
Communism is like one big phone company.
Lenny Bruce | Refcard PDF ↑
- 3
Every day people are straying away from the church and going back to God.
Lenny Bruce | Refcard PDF ↑
- 4
I hate small towns because once you've seen the cannon in the park there's nothing else to do.
Lenny Bruce | Refcard PDF ↑
- 5
I won't say ours was a tough school, but we had our own coroner. We used to write essays like: What I'm going to be if I grow up.
Lenny Bruce | Refcard PDF ↑
- 6
I'll die young, but it's like kissing God.
Lenny Bruce | Refcard PDF ↑
- 7
If Jesus had been killed twenty years ago, Catholic school children would be wearing little electric chairs around their necks instead of crosses.
Lenny Bruce | Refcard PDF ↑
- 8
If you can take the hot lead enema, then you can cast the first stone.
Lenny Bruce | Refcard PDF ↑
- 9
In the Halls of Justice the only justice is in the halls.
Lenny Bruce | Refcard PDF ↑
- 10
Miami Beach is where neon goes to die.
Lenny Bruce | Refcard PDF ↑
- 11
Satire is tragedy plus time. You give it enough time, the public, the reviewers will allow you to satirize it. Which is rather ridiculous, when you think about it.
Lenny Bruce | Refcard PDF ↑
- 12
The "what should be" never did exist, but people keep trying to live up to it. There is no "what should be," there is only what is.
Lenny Bruce | Refcard PDF ↑
- 13
The liberals can understand everything but people who don't understand them.
Lenny Bruce | Refcard PDF ↑
- 14
The only honest art form is laughter, comedy. You can't fake it... try to fake three laughs in an hour - ha ha ha ha ha - they'll take you away, man. You can't.
Lenny Bruce | Refcard PDF ↑
- 15
The only truly anonymous donor is the guy who knocks up your daughter.
Lenny Bruce | Refcard PDF ↑
- 16
The role of a comedian is to make the audience laugh, at a minimum of once every fifteen seconds.
Lenny Bruce | Refcard PDF ↑
- 17
There are never enough I Love You's.
Lenny Bruce | Refcard PDF ↑
- 18
When you're eight years old nothing is your business.
Lenny Bruce | Refcard PDF ↑
